Museum of Modern

Monday, April 29, 2013

Today I Turn 30

Today is my 30th birthday. Which means my phone was chiming like crazy from all the Facebook messages telling me to have a great day.

My Hubby and kids took me out for supper. I would love to say it was a pleasant evening but in reality it was terrible. We stopped at Best Buy to look for a new camera battery (which they didn't have) and the kids were in fine form.

The boy saw some action figures he had to have. The girl just wanted to run around and scream. Boy threw one of his recent epic fits when we were leaving, screaming on the way to the car.

We almost didn't go to supper but boy calmed down by the time we reached a place he agreed to eat at. Can't even pick the restaurant on my own birthday. It ended up being Chili's which is completely acceptable.

I don't feel 30. I still feel 25, or 23, or 27. I constantly forget my age, not that anyone asks on a regular basis, but on the rare occasion I have to stop myself from saying 25 or 28.

I'm 30. No feelings of depression, no impending mid life crisis looming (I know that usually happens at 50, but it's possible at 30).

I do, however, have a few regrets.

1) Not getting out more in college. I didn't join a sorority in college for many reasons. I only had a handful of friends attend my wedding. I was a little bit jealous of the girls who had those special sorority dances at their weddings w/ all their sisters there.

2) I didn't have my 1st child sooner. This might be considered vain, but the Hubby and I are considering a 3rd child and I can't help but be nervous about having a child over 30. I had my son at 26. We had been married for 3 years which seems pretty average. We wanted to enjoy each other before having to share our attentions. Now I'm wondering if maybe I should have started a year sooner.

3) I wanted to travel more. Hubby and I are high school sweethearts. We got married right out of college. I don't regret getting married so young, but I do regret not seeing more of the world, either in the U.S. or internationally. I traveled to England and Italy w/ my choir group in college so I have experience traveling.

4) Not continuing piano and voice lessons. My mother made me take piano lessons for years when I was young. I hated them. Never practiced. Begged her to let me stop. She finally did. I moved on to voice lessons. I had a nice singing voice, but I wasn't very confident. My voice shook when I sang in public alone and it ruined my self confidence. Made me uncomfortable.

5) Be more confident, outgoing. I know it's hard to change your personality no matter what age you are. I remember as a child my cousins and I would routinely perform skits and put together plays for our family at birthday parties and other get togethers. When I was younger I wanted to be a performer. Not a pop or country star, but a dancer like on a cruise ship or Broadway show. I didn't take dance lessons as a child, but I still hung on to the dream. I sang in choir in college, had a nice scholarship, but didn't have the discipline to practice or motivation to continue.

These regrets don't mean I'm unhappy w/ my life. Quite the opposite. I have 2 beautiful children that make me laugh on a daily basis, a Hubby that's supportive, makes me laugh, and is an amazing father. I have more than I could ever hope for and can't wait to see what the next 30+ years have in store.

1 comment:

  1. Happy birthday! My 30s have been my best years yet. Oh, and don't worry about having kids past 30. I had my daughter when I was 34, and I'm still able to keep up with her. :)